[ it's breathless, the way he says daeshim's name, exhaled into the air around them. daeshim in his own world might have been proper and modest, but he was always, always honest and true, like daeshim is right now. baein's heart seizes with how the other easily reds through baein's words in a way that leaves baein at a loss for words, rebuttals, or anything. because he doesn't even realize it himself. ]
But— it's true that I don't—
[ holding himself back... but what else could he do, when it's what he's done all his life. but what he wants is so different. so much more, and baein buries his face against the side of daeshim's head. hid voice is muffled into a mumble. ]
[ something behind the prince's eyes and at the back of his throat shoots through with a burn and he swallows thickly because he doesn't want to feel like this right now.
daeshim is reading him like an open book and sees things that baein didn't even see himself. and the vampire hates the way his heart both lurches and doesn't move at all. (it's the latter. it's not moved in weeks, and he knows that.) ]
You... I... [ the words are whispered and baein hitches on air before he swallows again. ] I not try to.
[ daeshim starts to speak and of course he doesn't see what baein means, and baein is about to protest, but then he quiets, because he's proven wrong. again. and all because he was too caught up in his own wallowing.
the prince lets daeshim tilt his head up, and he meets his eyes, his own wide and a little worried, but he swallows and nods. there's nothing but logic there, and it squashes his insecurities, slowly but surely. ]
I do trust you...
[ he just doesn't trust himself as much, but he wants to. ]
[for a fae. which sets the bar pretty low, honestly. but he looks proud of himself anyway, because baein paid him a compliment. bae says that he trusts him, and it's-
well it's not everything that he wants. maybe he should take more of his own advice.]
[ not just because he's daeshim and essentially the same as the daeshim baein knows while still being so wildly different... baein just. trusts him, without restraint. because it feels right.
he smiles a little at the other, mellowed from their conversation, and just very grateful for daeshim being there, for even coming over. ]
[ the vampire almost does jump, blinking at staring at the fae for a second at the question.
and then he blinks again. ]
What?
[ after thinking for a second, baein does think he knows, but his cheeks go a pale pink at the vague implication he recalls, still a little confused if this is what daeshim means. ]
I think it's- it's a certain way of dressing yourself in a more revealing manner...?
[ the smile has baein raise an eyebrow, or both, actually, and he lets out a little laugh. ]
Is that so? Then I suppose we should.
[ it's a thing to do with daeshim, and even if baein is a little uncertain of the propriety of it, he doesn't really mind. besides... he'd do anything if daeshim asked. and it does sound fun, like an adventure, almost. ]
[ baein swallows and nods then, because until now he hadn't considered the time of day, but... daeshim did, and his shoulders sag a little bit with the relief and gratefulness. ]
So... the night market, then? Is there a night market here?
[ it's always been his to go to thing to do, visit the night markets, even as a human, he did, up until it cost him his life in a way. but the idea of going out and roam around is nostalgic, almost. like something he's longed to do for a while but hasn't felt compelled to do. ]
[daeshim just hasn't actually been to it, for reasons he pauses to explain.]
All the markets here only accept money.
[the frown on his lips and the way his brows pull together shows what daeshim thinks of that. but he does have some money now, so he'll use it if he must. he continues leading him out the door.]
[ but baein tilts his head and considers for a moment. daeshim has always professed the importance of his treasures, of the little trinkets and nuts and rocks he carries around, and even if baein hasn't asked outright, he does understand. ]
Though... you're right, they really should consider other payment methods. Not everyone uses money.
[ the question is a little out there though, and baein blinks for a second, thinking. ]
I'm not sure... I do like green a lot, like the garden, or all the purple flowers. [ he smiles then, small and a little bashful. ] Or purple, like your hair.
[what about pink, like his face? because that's the color daeshim's face turns when bae compliments his hair. his other comments are also appreciated more than he knows - not many people seem to understand his treasures. maybe baein doesn't either, but he's trying.]
Mm, I bet they're all nice colors for slutty clothes. We should find some in them!
[it might be harder than the fae realizes. but baein would definitely look beautiful dressed in green like the garden, or purple like his hair.
his skin will not be returning to its usual tan any time soon.]
[ he might not understand all of it, but he understands the way daeshim treasures it, respects him too much to just dismiss the importance of the fae's values. to be fair, baein wouldn't dismiss anyone's values that easily in the first place.
the vampire is faintly pink still, the shade not fading for him either, and he smiles at the fae's excitement. ]
What are your favorite colors, Daeshim? We should find some for you too.
[daeshim laughs like he just pulled off some clever joke. mostly it's just happiness, happiness for time spent with bae and his hand in his.]
But I also like green. And yellow... [the fae trails off, biting his bottom lip. having a filter is unusual for him, but he's trying when it comes to certain things out of consideration.] The Bae from my world, he liked yellow too. The flowers that bloomed for him were mostly yellow.
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narcolepsy) wrote2026-04-24 08:28 pm
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[because he's enough like the baein that daeshim knew and also loved. giving is a part of who he is.]
But you always speak of 'needs' when it comes to yourself.
[daeshim presses against him again, cheek resting against him.]
You hold yourself back. I know.
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[ it's breathless, the way he says daeshim's name, exhaled into the air around them. daeshim in his own world might have been proper and modest, but he was always, always honest and true, like daeshim is right now. baein's heart seizes with how the other easily reds through baein's words in a way that leaves baein at a loss for words, rebuttals, or anything. because he doesn't even realize it himself. ]
But— it's true that I don't—
[ holding himself back... but what else could he do, when it's what he's done all his life. but what he wants is so different. so much more, and baein buries his face against the side of daeshim's head. hid voice is muffled into a mumble. ]
How do you know that?
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[he says it quietly, his eyes closing.]
In your eyes. In the way your lips sometimes part but then you don't say anything. Even the way you stand, always back.
[like he's not sure he belongs with anyone but wants to. daeshim watched his bae for a very long time. eventually he learned how to pay attention.]
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daeshim is reading him like an open book and sees things that baein didn't even see himself. and the vampire hates the way his heart both lurches and doesn't move at all. (it's the latter. it's not moved in weeks, and he knows that.) ]
You... I... [ the words are whispered and baein hitches on air before he swallows again. ] I not try to.
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[daeshim lifts his eyes to him, the question soft on his lips. he even gives bae a soft and supportive smile.]
What are your fears? You can tell me. You can tell me anything, always.
I try not to* wow i was tired writing that
I don't want to impose. I'm not great at this, and... I don't want to get in the way. I don't want to hurt anyone. I don't have a claim on anything...
[ he ducks his head and his voice wavers, lowers to a whisper. ]
Just because I want something doesn't mean I can just. Demand it.
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[sorry bae, old habits die hard. it takes daeshim a moment to really think about his words, and understand why he might feel that way.]
What I mean is...you should be honest. You should tell others what you want, and what you hope for. I'm sure they...I would want to know.
[he tries to gently lift his chin and look him in the eyes again.]
And then you must trust what they tell you.
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the prince lets daeshim tilt his head up, and he meets his eyes, his own wide and a little worried, but he swallows and nods. there's nothing but logic there, and it squashes his insecurities, slowly but surely. ]
I do trust you...
[ he just doesn't trust himself as much, but he wants to. ]
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[for a fae. which sets the bar pretty low, honestly. but he looks proud of himself anyway, because baein paid him a compliment. bae says that he trusts him, and it's-
well it's not everything that he wants. maybe he should take more of his own advice.]
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[ not just because he's daeshim and essentially the same as the daeshim baein knows while still being so wildly different... baein just. trusts him, without restraint. because it feels right.
he smiles a little at the other, mellowed from their conversation, and just very grateful for daeshim being there, for even coming over. ]
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but there was another reason that the fae came to him, and he remembers it suddenly.]
Oh!
[sorry, didn't mean to make you jump.]
Bae, do what does 'slutty' mean?
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and then he blinks again. ]
What?
[ after thinking for a second, baein does think he knows, but his cheeks go a pale pink at the vague implication he recalls, still a little confused if this is what daeshim means. ]
I think it's- it's a certain way of dressing yourself in a more revealing manner...?
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[he blinks and looks away for a moment. his thoughtful face really does make him look grumpy. but it brightens again after a moment.]
We should find some clothes like this, you and I!
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[ baein can't imagine why they'd need clothes like that, but he looks more surprised than unwilling. ]
Why...?
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[daeshim hasn't. and judging by his reaction, baein hasn't either.]
Don't you want to see what everyone thinks of you in them? I'm very curious about that now!
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Ah... that is a good point...
[ the implications has the little blood in his body rush to his cheeks though, even if he gives daeshim a hesitant smile. ]
Do you think we could find any here?
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I'm sure of it. We only need to seek them out.
[which is challenge enough. dae has never done anything like that either.]
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Is that so? Then I suppose we should.
[ it's a thing to do with daeshim, and even if baein is a little uncertain of the propriety of it, he doesn't really mind. besides... he'd do anything if daeshim asked. and it does sound fun, like an adventure, almost. ]
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We have plenty of time before the sun comes up!
[apparently they're doing this now. and if the shops are already closed...well, he has a plan. trust him.]
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So... the night market, then? Is there a night market here?
[ it's always been his to go to thing to do, visit the night markets, even as a human, he did, up until it cost him his life in a way. but the idea of going out and roam around is nostalgic, almost. like something he's longed to do for a while but hasn't felt compelled to do. ]
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All the markets here only accept money.
[the frown on his lips and the way his brows pull together shows what daeshim thinks of that. but he does have some money now, so he'll use it if he must. he continues leading him out the door.]
What's your favorite color?
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[ but baein tilts his head and considers for a moment. daeshim has always professed the importance of his treasures, of the little trinkets and nuts and rocks he carries around, and even if baein hasn't asked outright, he does understand. ]
Though... you're right, they really should consider other payment methods. Not everyone uses money.
[ the question is a little out there though, and baein blinks for a second, thinking. ]
I'm not sure... I do like green a lot, like the garden, or all the purple flowers. [ he smiles then, small and a little bashful. ] Or purple, like your hair.
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Mm, I bet they're all nice colors for slutty clothes. We should find some in them!
[it might be harder than the fae realizes. but baein would definitely look beautiful dressed in green like the garden, or purple like his hair.
his skin will not be returning to its usual tan any time soon.]
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the vampire is faintly pink still, the shade not fading for him either, and he smiles at the fae's excitement. ]
What are your favorite colors, Daeshim? We should find some for you too.
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[daeshim laughs like he just pulled off some clever joke. mostly it's just happiness, happiness for time spent with bae and his hand in his.]
But I also like green. And yellow... [the fae trails off, biting his bottom lip. having a filter is unusual for him, but he's trying when it comes to certain things out of consideration.] The Bae from my world, he liked yellow too. The flowers that bloomed for him were mostly yellow.
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